To blame the demise of anything on a handful of individuals probably isn’t fair. It isn’t fair, but part of me believes it. My favorite place on Earth, Silver Bay, is tainted for me now and it’s because of a group and mindset I’d never experienced there until this year. I believe there is a place in this world for just about everything. If you’re in a bad place and you need help, get it any way you can. If turning to Jesus reforms your soul, turn to him. If peer counseling helps you, sign yourself up…just don’t fall back into the trenches. The one thing I will not stand for, though, is the oppression of people because of your beliefs. America was founded to provide religious freedom to oppressed religious minorities in Europe and here we can enjoy religious freedom. Who are you to challenge that?

A few weeks ago I was having a conversation at a spiritual meeting of sorts at Silver Bay about our “Truest Self” and what exactly that means. We discussed what it is that has, at points, removed us from our truest self, and this was something I’d never really contemplated before. (DISCLAIMER: I consider myself an intensely spiritual person and I utterly detest organized religion for their practices and social expectations, not for their values, which I believe are wholly good and right.) I realized that, although I had done everything “the right way” (graduate high school with honors, go to college, study abroad (twice), captain my sport team (rugby), write for the school paper, and graduate with honors and two degrees, get a job doing what I studied and live on my own) that I wasn’t entirely happy. Part of me didn’t really understand because this was the way I was taught and told life works, and I gave into all these expectations so I could live a full and happy life. But although my life was full, and filled with love and success, I gradually became less happy.

The expectations of other people are what got me away from my truest self. I am in no way upset about my path in life; I’m grateful for the pressure, both from home and society, that pushed me to be where I am today, but it was only until I let go of others’ expectations of right and wrong, good and bad, did I re-route my path back to my truest self. Something I’ve come to wonder lately is how people affiliated with a religious group can feel something deep, be it love, happiness, hate, passion, etc., and decide that what they feel is wrong because it doesn’t comply with the rules set forth to them by others. I’m going to try and have this conversation as sensitively and concisely as I possibly can and I implore you to comment on this post to tell me your opinion, including where I’ve been insensitive.

Back to Silver Bay. For me, and so many of my peers and mentors, Silver Bay has been a place of healing and self discovery. It is my forever home and I’m incredibly protective of the places and people I love. Recently, certain mindsets have been a part of campus that, in the simplest sense, I just can’t get down with. I’m all about believing in something: God, yourself, the greater good, science. Believe in SOMETHING or you have nothing to live for. I have friends that span an incredible array of beliefs and I am grateful to each and every one of them (truly) for teaching me more about this world and the ways we can look at it. There are sometimes, though, that I feel their beliefs have taken over their truest self and guided them down the wrong path. If something makes you happy, is filled with love, is safe and good for your soul, but your book says is “wrong”, do you extract that from your life? If your friend is happiest when (s)he is doing or being something your group says is “wrong,” do you tell her/him that (s)he is wrong?

Unfortunately for some the answer is yes. I’ve learned from a group this summer that, more or less, you may go to heaven as long as you recognize and accept Jesus in your life. That’s all the requirements. Rape, pillage, murder, steal, cheat, sex out of wedlock, etc., don’t really matter so long as Jesus is in your heart. You will go to heaven. Now, I’ve been trying to explain to some of these people that this particular concept is one us people without religious affiliation just cannot get down with. Sally Jo lives a beautiful life of love and charity and does all she can for as many people as she can, will go to hell if she has not claimed Jesus; but Jesse Mae who had killed in the name of her savior, or herself, or beat her kids, or some other awful thing, will go to heaven with Jesus in her heart. I. Don’t. Understand.

Fine, fine, fine, lets get back. So, you see someone you love doing something your book says is wrong. Forcing them to repent, even though it is not where they want to be and is moving them at rapid speed away from their Truest Self, is wayyyyyy more wrong. That is NOT an act of love. In fact, i perceive that as selfish, to keep someone away from what makes them beam with joy because you, or some other dude (because, lets be real, they’re all men), or a book says, is selfish. Need i remind you that Scientologists have a book, too? This life is beautiful and the beauty is in diversity, in the flaws and differences between humans and their choices. Who are you to decide what’s right for someone else? I realize this may not be taken seriously by some, but I implore you to look within and ask why. Why is what you believe absolute truth? Why do you damn your friends–or better yet, why do you believe the person in front of you that damns the only things that make the people you love happy? And, possibly, the things that make you truly happy, too?

We are all sinners in every sense of the word, but things get fuzzy when certain sins outweigh others. Religions and followers play favorites. According to the above mentioned thought about going to heaven or hell, all sins are weighed the same, soooo why is homosexuality chastised by the same people who experience pre-marital sex? Here are some things the Bible says are sins, but we just don’t really like to talk about:

• Leviticus 19:28 reads, “You shall not make any cuts in your body for the dead nor make any tattoo marks on yourselves: I am the Lord.” (no tats, kids, sorry.)
• Leviticus 19:19 reads, “You are to keep My statutes. You shall not breed together two kinds of your cattle; you shall not sow your field with two kinds of seed, nor wear a garment upon you of two kinds of material mixed together.” (what do you think you eat and wear every day?)
• Leviticus 19:27 reads “You shall not round off the side-growth of your heads nor harm the edges of your beard.” (see ya later bowl-cuts)

I know these are old testament, but, how can one site Leviticus 18:22 “You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination,” as truth or law without recognizing these as such? (Please, people, school me on this. I’m not a Bible scholar and I would love to know more, in earnest.)

There’s a lot more to say here, but the homosexuality thing really gets me. Who are you to tell someone their choices are wrong or call them a sin? We are all sinners, but the most potent and unyielding message that God teaches us is Love. I’m afraid that much of the love I’ve felt overcome me at Silver Bay in the past is no longer there. I hope one day this true love and understanding will find its way home and come back to my favorite place. I implore you to look within yourself and tell me how chastising someone for their beliefs (draining the love) is making the world a better place? The funny thing is, the non-religious spiritual people rarely condemn other beliefs unless they are harmful to others. Makes you think, who would an all-loving, righteous God protect and save in the end?

NOTE: I did not intend to offend anyone here, although I’m sure I will at some point. I’m sorry, I would just like to open up this conversation. I am upset at the way things are happening on the shores of Lake George and I would really enjoy hearing another person’s perspective. I take no issue with faith at all. Any kind of faith. Religion, however, I’m fuzzy with. I do believe we are all entitled to our thoughts, beliefs and opinions, though, so feel free to rip into me. Thank you for understanding and being a part of this conversation.