Today is a beautiful BEAUTIFUL day in Korea and there is no sunshine poking through the clouds. What makes it beautiful is the utter lack of humidity. I can bravely go out into the world today and know that I won’t melt into a puddle of sweat and makeup before I even get to the bus station. That being said, temperature wise, it’s not that hot here. Unless the sun is out. The sun and humidity together mix to create a Florida-type climate which I am just not about.

This is my first post in Korea and I’ve been here for about a week and a half. Sorry I’m not sorry. I’ve been busy taking classes, making friends, tripping over the language and trying to find my way around. After our 8-9 day orientation I came down to Gwangju, where I will be living and teaching for the next year. I’m happy to finally be settled into a place I can call home, even if I occasionally forget that this “home” is on the opposite side of the planet to the place I grew up. You would be surprised how often I forget I’m in Korea. I’m reminded quickly when I step out of my apartment and am hit with sights, smells, languages and writing that still seem pretty foreign. I am grateful, however, that I’ve had previous experiences with squatter potties. At least that part seems a bit old hat.

Anyway….ORIENTATION. So after a really really really long journey I arrived at orientation. I flew from Newark to Chicago, had a 4 hour layover, and then flew from Chicago to Seoul. Thank God I met Jasmine in Chicago. I suppose she was my friend friend in Korea, even if we met in Chicago. Unfortunately, Jasmine is teaching in another city…all the more reason to explore! Here she is:

Ok, so, first came Wheels (Jasmine). Next came Korean immigration, which makes US immigration look like the Israel/Palestine border. When we all got our bags after the 14 hour ride (well, not all of us…Jasmine’s bags were left in San Francisco), we met with our EPIK coordinators at the airport. They checked us in, took videos of us saying “Anneong Hasayo” and “Kamsahamnida” and then loaded us onto a bus to Jeonju University for orientation. Jet-lagged as hell we rolled into a highway rest stop for dinner, and much like deer in the headlights, waited for someone to order (that knew enough Korean) and just threw our fingers up to say two, as in, I want that also but have zero Korean skills. Fact. And it was delicious.  I am beyond happy that I fully enjoy spicy food.

So, once we got to Jeonju we were herded around to sign in, get our temperature checked, pick up some snacks, and sent to our rooms where, for the most part, we crashed. Hard. Here’s the view from my room:

The next couple days included a bit of free time, an opening ceremony and performance, and a welcome dinner. The opening ceremony was really great. Our speaker, Walter Foreman, let us in on some Korean secrets (and some not so secret info) and got us all hyped for the year to come. We also saw a SICK Taekwondo performance and ate a shit ton of kimchi.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVgehNLwZW0&feature=youtu.be

I do have to say, however, the best part of this day was likely meeting Nygel and Lewis who cornered out the square with me and Jasmine. Their bromance is unmatched and our quad-love, though currently fractured, is fo’ life.

Clearly we had a terrible time during orientation. We had a lot of lectures about teaching in Korea and I can honestly say they were all worth listening to and I’ve come out of orientation feeling exponentially more prepared for teaching in Korea than when I got off the plane. There are also a lot of cultural things we all had to overcome (some of us took more time than others) like, not flushing toilet paper…and seeing the fruits of that labor in the bin next to the toilet; eating rice, salad and kimchi for breakfast; using towels the size of kitchen hand towels for your whole body; Korean sexism, racism and body image/ideal (including short short shorts as highly acceptable while an inch of cleavage makes you a whore, if you’re different, they stare, and they automatically assume black people are from Africa); and the extremes in bathroom use.

It’s time to talk about toilets. In Korea, there are three toilet paper scenarios that can play out at any given time. It doesn’t matter where you are, I found each of these in the University we were staying at for orientation. 1. Toilet paper in the stall with you like in the states. 2. Toilet paper outside the stall. You need to take it in with you. Or, 3. No toilet paper at all in the bathroom. Always come prepared. Also, the disparity in toilets is insane. Again, just talking about Jeonju University, I came in contact with a classic Asian squatter, with no toilet paper, and just a bin; and I also had experiences (many) where the toilet was so high-tech I didn’t even know how to flush it. Not to mention that at some point someone tried to figure out what all the little buttons mean and turned on the seat warmer. Nice for them, not so nice for the person (me) who came to an empty bathroom and had a very warm toilet seat. Yuck. So, that’s what you have to look forward to as far as bathrooms are concerned. Bars can be worse, and just keep in mind you aren’t in Kansas anymore.

A definite highlight of orientation was our Field Trip to Hanuk Village. This village was built by wealthy Koreans who, during the Japanese occupation, didn’t want to live amongst the Japanese that were invading their city. It’s a really cool place filled with awesome food and shops, but it’s really touristy. All the Koreans were walking around with what I like to call “Selfie Sticks” which are just mounts for their smartphones….and they are literally taking selfies and ussies EVERYWHERE. (WordPress, tell me why “selfies” isn’t marked with a red line and “ussies” is?) At Hanuk Village we had a lot of free time to explore:

We found Korean Jesus…and DAMN were a lot of selfies on sticks happening by this cathedral.

We had some traditional and world-renowned Korean food called Bibimbap…with all the sides included, of course.

We hung out with our class leaders, Joy (in her Dodgers hat) and Dahlia, who were awesome.

And we made stupid faces alllllll over the place, just eating and hanging out.

The most cultural experience we had, however, was when we split up for traditional Korean papercraft, Korean drum lessons, and Korean mask dancing. We all made paper fans…which would have been way more clutch earlier in the day when all of us were sweating profusely.

My group played the drums, while their group did the mask dance. Here we are listening intently and not so intently:

And here’s an example of what these guys can do:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUKIdgCascs&feature=youtu.be

All in all it was a great day with a lot of good times. The only thing we really had to worry about after that was our lesson demonstrations with the group they picked at random. Everyone here knows how I felt about one of my group members in particular. She’s not in Korea to make friends with expats and she made that crystal clear. I’ve never felt so grateful to be white. Anyway, yeah. We gave our lessons on Tuesday, got our certificate of completion, and were also given the results of the medical check we took last week. This included height, weight, eyes, ears, blood, chest x-rax, and urinalysis. We ALL passed…and the auditorium erupted in applause. Says a lot, no?

That night we went out and celebrated with beer, norebang (karaoke) and soju after our farewell feast (which was absolutely incredible).

Wednesday I made my way to Gwangju by bus with all the people joining me in this wonderful city. We awkwardly sat down next to our new co-teachers and listened to their meeting in Korean. My co-teachers are awesome and there is sooo much more to learn about them and about my schools because I don’t actually have to be there for work teaching until Monday. I’m lucky like that.

I’m also lucky because the guy I’m replacing, Alex, kept the apartment I’ve inherited in good shape, and left me lots of stuff I might need. He’s also still in the city so along with his friend Jenn and the girl who replaced her, Tessa, we went out for some amazing Korean BBQ downtown, and they gave us an overview of some of the expat bars we will soon be familiar with.

And so the adventure begins. A long post, I know; hopefully I won’t wait so long between them next time. If you want my address to send me mail or a package (different addresses) please let me know. I will never turn away a little slice of home!

It’s important for me to post now, at the peak of my crisis. Some of you think I have my life together and all my ducks in a row, which makes me laugh. I’m as dysfunctional as the next 20-something, I just do things a little differently. For example, I’ve spent the last 48 hours (emphasizing the last 10) almost numb from the tornado of emotions I’ve been feeling. I’m overwhelmed to say the least. And here I sit, in Newark Liberty International Airport, convincing myself to follow my feet. It’s time to shit or get off the pot–and boys and girls, this is the biggest dump I’ve ever taken.
Leaving my friends and family behind is hard enough, but watching my mom cry as I left nearly broke my heart. I’m a big girl, but I love my mommy…and I needed comfort so badly that my teddy bear is making the journey with me. This is everything I’ve wanted for a while now. I’ve had to make sacrifice after sacrifice to get where I am now and here I am, freaking the fuck out. I guess my point here is that just because you’re scared or nervous or second guessing yourself doesn’t mean that it isn’t the right thing. When you were more lucid and thinking clearly, this was what you wanted. Your mind will jump into survival mode and play tricks on your wants and needs. Be confident in your choices because you made them for a reason.

It’s so hard to take your own advice.

At some point the tears are going to have to run out or I’m going to give up on the second guessing and nerves because the ball is rolling, the contract is signed and I’m about to board a plane. Fear will subside and a sense of adventure will settle in. Nerves will turn to wanderlust and fear will become excitement. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t praying that switch comes soon.

Waiting is always the hardest part and the wait is finally over.

I wouldn’t be able to leave my last post in good faith without adding a few things I’ve missed. Many, many people–affiliate of this particular group or not–have approached me for what I’ve written. I stand by every word, however, I need you all to realize that this sentiment is not all-encompassing. In every group of people there are some misguided souls and bad seeds, but quite often those people are the minority. This is no different. Many (MANY) of the people in this particular group at Silver Bay have become friends whose hearts, thoughts and friendship matter deeply to me. These are people who give themselves for others, who do all they can to make other people feel loved, even when they are in need of loving themselves.

It  pains me to know that I’ve hurt these people by my words on here. I’m simply trying to understand some of the rules and practices that sound just so wrong to me, and I’m venting about things I’ve felt have changed. I KNOW that those of you I’ve let into my life and have reciprocated love for would NEVER judge me, my choices, or push your beliefs onto me. But you know that there are some people in your group, some bad seeds, that muddy the beautiful image you represent for your group. I want you all to know that as individuals, you are strong, good-willed, beautiful human beings and I cherish our friendship. Unfortunately, when writing about a group, quite often a sweeping generalization is the more respectable way to go about starting the conversation. Pointing fingers publicly isn’t my style. If you want a play by play of the good, bad and ugly, I’ll be in-country for a week and a half. Please come find me.

I hope those of you who are part of this group, who I love and respect, can respect the fact that I’m standing by what I’ve said. I never intended to hurt anyone I love, but these are MY beliefs, thoughts and questions, and I need you to respect them as I do yours. I apologize if what was said implied that I didn’t respect you, your choices or beliefs; that was certainly not my intent. But maybe, if you can just try to see it from my side, maybe you can help reel those rogue souls in. I would hate to see a group of wonderful humans vanish from campus because of a few (honestly, it’s mostly men) who make people outside that group feel judged and uncomfortable. Maybe, instead of focusing on the rest of the world, the judgement and conversation should be turned inward to this group. Even just one conversation can be an eye-opener.

I am a sinner, yes, but I am not a sin. I honestly couldn’t care less what most people think of me. I got over that shit a long time ago. But for the people that DO care and who ARE spiritual and religious, outside this group, think about how they feel being told that they’re wrong and they’re going to hell…even if their church tells them different. I implore EVERYONE in ALL situations to play devil’s advocate and look at issues from all sides, including (and especially) the ones you staunchly disagree with.

In closing, some of the best friends I’ve made this summer are part of this group or are otherwise deeply spiritual and I do not mean to imply that they are the “problem” here. They are beautiful human beings who have taught me so much, who I am lucky to know. I love you beautiful people and I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you.